The following short quiz consists of 4 questions and will tell you if you are qualified to be a professional. Scroll down for each answer. The questions are NOT that difficult. But don’t scroll down UNTIL you have answered the question!

1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?

The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. This question tested whether you tend to do simple things In an overly complicated way.

2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?

Did you say, Open the refrigerator, Put in the elephant, And close the Refrigerator?
Wrong Answer.

Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, Put in the elephant and close the door.  This tested your ability to think through the repercussions of your previous actions.

3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend….except one. Which animal does not attend?

Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there.

This tested your memory.

Okay, even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly, You still have one more chance to show your true abilities.

4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat.. How do you
manage?

Correct Answer: You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the animal conference.

This tested whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.

According to Anderson Consulting Worldwide, around 90% of the professionals they tested got all questions wrong, but many preschoolers got several correct answers. Anderson Consulting says this conclusively disproves the theory that most professionals have the brains of a four-year-old.

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Really do I need to comment on this????

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An Italian is drinking in a New York bar when he gets a call on his cell phone. He hangs up, grinning from ear to ear, and orders a round of drinks for everybody in the bar announcing his wife had produced a typical Italian baby boy weighing 25 pounds.

Nobody can believe that any new baby can weigh in at 25 pounds, but the Italian guy just shrugs, ‘That’s about average back home, folks……like I said, my boy’s a typical Italian bambino.’

Congratulations showered him from all around, and many exclamations of ‘WOW’….one woman actually fainted due to sympathy pains.

Two weeks later he returns to the bar.

The bartender says, ‘Say you’re the father of that typical Italian baby that weighed 25 pounds at birth. Everybody’s been making bets about how big he’d be in two weeks. So how much does he weigh now?’

The proud father answers, ‘Seventeen pounds.’

The bartender is puzzled, concerned, and a little suspicious.
‘What happened? He already weighed 25 pounds the day he was born!’

The Italian father takes a long swig ofSambuca, wipes his lips on his shirt sleeve, leans into the bartender and proudly says…..

‘We had him circumcised .

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A husband and wife came for counseling after 15 years of marriage. When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the 15 years they had been married.

She went on and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable, an entire laundry list of unmet needs she had endured over the course of their marriage.
Finally, after allowing this to go on for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up, walked around the desk and, after asking the wife to stand, embraced and kissed her passionately as her husband watched with a raised eyebrow. The woman shut up and quietly sat down as though in a daze.

The therapist turned to the husband and said, ‘This is what your wife needs at least three times a week. Can you do this?’

The husband thought for a moment and replied, ‘Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays, I fish.’

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An old hillbilly farmer had a wife who nagged him unmercifully. From morning until night (and sometimes later), she was always complaining about something. The only time he got any relief was when he was out plowing with his old mule. He tried to plow a lot.

One day, when he was out plowing, his wife brought him lunch in the field. He drove the mule into the shade, sat down on a stump, and began to eat his lunch.

Immediately, his wife began nagging him again. Complain, nag, nag; it just went on and on. All of a sudden, the old mule lashed out with both hind feet — caught her smack in the back of the head. Killed her dead on the spot.

At the funeral several days later, the minister noticed something rather odd. When a woman mourner would approach the old farmer, he would listen for a minute, then nod his head in agreement; but when a male mourner approached him, he would listen for a minute, then shake his head in disagreement. This was so consistent, the minister decided to ask the old farmer about it.

After the funeral, the minister spoke to the old farmer, and asked him why he nodded his head and agreed with all the women, but always shook his head and disagreed with the men.

The old farmer said, “Well, the women would come up and say something about how nice my wife looked, or how pretty her dress was, so I’d nod my head in agreement.”

“And what about the men?” the minister asked.

“They wanted to know if the mule was for sale.”

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