BANKING IN TORONTO, NEWFIE STYLE

Filed Under (Wittyisms) by Fish on 12-07-2010

A Newfie walked into a bank in Toronto and asked for the loans officer.. He told the loans officer that he was going to Newfoundland on business for two weeks and needed to borrow $5,000, however he was not a depositor of the bank. The bank officer told him that the bank would need some form of security for the loan, so the Newfie handed over the keys to a new Ferrari. The car was parked on the street in front of the bank. The Newfie produced the title and everything checked out. The loan officer agreed to hold the car as collateral for the loan and apologized for having to charge 12% interest.

Later, the bank’s president and its officers all enjoyed a good laugh at the Newfie for using a $250,000 Ferrari as collateral for a $5,000 loan. An employee of the bank then drove the Ferrari into the bank’s underground garage and parked it. Two weeks later, the Newfie returned, repaid the $5,000 and the interest of $23.07. The loan officer said, ‘Sir, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled.

While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire.

What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?’

The Newfie replied: ‘

Where else in Toronto can I park my car for two weeks for only $23.07 and expect it to be there when I return?’

Ah, Newfies…..

Bless The Newfie

Filed Under (Random Fish) by Fish on 11-05-2010

A Newfie calls up his lawyer and asks. “Wit all dem lawsuits Going on I’m feelin’ kinda left out. How do I get in on some of dat Action? I hears that people are suing the cigarette companies ’cause they Got cancer and others are suing the Big Mac company cause they got themselves fat and all kinds of stuff”!! His lawyer asks “And which one of those categories do You fit under?” The dear ole Newfie God bless his soul
Answers. Neider b’y, I just wanna know if I can sue Molson’s for all them ugly women I woke up wit…

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Newfie Scuba Diver

Filed Under (Random Fish) by Fish on 03-05-2010

An American tourist asks a Newfoundlander:
“Why do Scuba divers always fall
backwards off their boats?”
To which the Newfoundlander replies:
“If they fell forwards they’d still be in the f’in boat”

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