When I got home last night, my girlfriend demanded that I take her out to some place expensive……………….

So I took her to a gas station!!!

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I really tried to post this weekend but I ended up having too many things to do. The four crazy dogs are keeping me very busy. I also got a new car stereo and speakers installed this weekend, it sounds so much better then the factory deck. I’m glad I brought my car into the next century and out of the dark ages.

Went out a couple of nights this weekend and had a few beers. The girlfriend got a little ‘tipsy’ Friday night but she had a good time. She woke up a little confused and tired but as soon as we left the house to go shopping she was wide awake and all smiles. It funny sometimes what shopping can cure. Well such is the way of the women.

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Thought this was funny, some of them in particular :)ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

Smart man + smart woman = romance

Smart man + dumb woman = affair

Dumb man + smart woman = marriage

Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy

OFFICE ARITHMETIC

Smart boss + smart employee = profit

Smart boss + dumb employee =production

Dumb boss + smart employee =promotion

Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

SHOPPING MATH

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t need.

GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

HAPPINESS

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

LONGEVITY

Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.

PROPENSITY TO CHANGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, and she does.

DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE

A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED

Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, “You’re next.” They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

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I’ve been dog sitting which as meant getting up extra early to walk, feed, and play with them. Needless to say I have been waking up a bit confused and feeling out of place. My girlfriend and I started packing our stuff to move at the end of the month.

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